


Cheesy Dreams

by ImfictionWriting



Category: Magnum P.I. (TV 2018)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Because I haven't seen S3 yet, By crack I mean Pop Rocks and Sherbet (wizz fizz), Cheese Pizza and Stress, Dreams and Nightmares, Fluff and Crack, Gen, He loves her but is too dumb to know it, Humor, until the end
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-10
Updated: 2020-12-10
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:01:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27984243
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImfictionWriting/pseuds/ImfictionWriting
Summary: Magnum has a stress dream while Higgy is in hospital.
Comments: 12
Kudos: 18





	Cheesy Dreams

**Author's Note:**

> Sooper Sekrit Unofficial Epilogue in the comments ;-)
> 
> Magnum P.I. 2018 Characters not mine. Just having fun.
> 
> All constructive criticism will be thoughtfully considered with a great deal of thanks in advance. Please tell me of any and all oopsies. I do hope someone finds this entertaining.
> 
> (I only finished watching S2 a month ago after watching both seasons over a couple weeks. This fic mentions details of S3 which I have not seen. So consider it AU or just a bit of free entertainment.)

Higgins had to spend the night in hospital but only for observation with an early morning release the likely plan.

\- - -

After an exhausting day Magnum finally went home, but only after the staff had to mock threaten calling security. They had let him stay for an hour after visiting hours. He left as Higgins seemed to be finally resting comfortably.

Comfort food of a four cheese pizza, with extra cheese and a liberal shake of dried chili flakes inhaled more than eaten. The feeling of being unsettled when Higgins was hurt seemed to exponentially grow every time it happened this last year. It didn't matter how much he told his brain to 'settle down, Higgins is safe', his thoughts and heart rate would continue to spike with the memory of Juliet being shot and needing CPR.

After the events of the day it would surprise absolutely no one that he started to fall asleep on the very comfortable couch only to startle himself awake, then repeat the action again and again. Magnum had come to accept that he'd likely not sleep tonight, ironically giving himself this permission had led to getting sleepy once more. This time Magnum was jolted awake at the remembered echo of Higgy's delighted and drugged up voice saying joyfully 'Jello, jello, jello.'

It had made no sense that Higgy would want jello, everyone knew pudding was the food of choice for curing illness, ...and ice cream.

“Besides it's called Jelly in England...” Magnum said to himself rolling over onto his other side and shifting the cushion to be more comfortable under his ear.

And with that thought any drowsiness and sleepiness Thomas Magnum had felt drifted away and he was fully alert.

Thomas Magnum had been in the military from the moment he was old enough to join and during that time had participated in multiple multi-national operations with people from all the native English speaking countries (and many others that weren't). Military, ancillary staff and private contractors included. In the absence of being able to discuss anything restricted, politics, religion, basically anything that would lead to a _real_ fight or international 'incident', the conversations would all go the same way. _Every single time_ when there had been no new entertainment, a pick up basketball or card game to keep them busy, the discussion always, _always_ morphed to language differences and who had the better candy. Heat and intense physical exercise _always_ gave people sugar cravings.

It would always start with the candy, which the English would call sweets and the Australians and Kiwi's, lollies. Which would lead to what to call iceblocks/lollies/icypoles/popsicles, jam/jelly/jello. Then pop/soda/fizzy drink/cold drink, the 'biscuit versus cookie' debate could last as long as the Brits could argue among themselves in the 'scon' versus 'scown' pronunciation battle.

The English speakers from England would be quickly shut down if the origins of the language argument was raised because that debate would lead to absolutely everyone, even the Canadians, threatening physical harm if they didn't shut up.

With the South Africans telling them to 'stop being a chop' and the Kiwi's and Aussies nodding and agreeing while everyone else would stop and wonder what _that_ meant.

Most times what ever the argument it would invariably be an Australian who declared that they were the correct one. It would be amusing to all as usually there would be a Brit and a Canadian sharing eye contact then rolling their eyes behind them while the New Zealander, would say 'pull your head out ya arse' or 'pull you head in', oddly enough both phrases seemed to mean the same thing.

Oh and if you really wanted to confuse a native English speaker from another country ask them if they knew what custard was then stand back as they all argued among themselves for the next twenty minutes.

Consequently Magnum was 'au fait' with the completely useless knowledge that Brits used the French terms for most of their vegetables and that was a long time before even meeting Juliet 'Higgy' Higgins.

The thoughts of those silly conversations in his head, finally Magnum went to sleep.

\- - -

It was lunch time, Higgins was home from hospital, just as planned and sitting at the kitchen island, Magnum was standing in front of the opened fridge contemplating what to prepare for a meal. There was a tub of hummus and a container of fresh snow peas, perfect for dipping. That would do while a couple sandwiches were prepped.

Magnum brought out the vegetables, they were called something French in England but for the life of him he couldn't remember.

“Hey, Higgy, what are these called in Britain again?”

Higgins looked at the vegetables then back at Magnum, as if _he_ was the one with the possible head injury.

“They are snow peas, Magnum.”

Magnum looked at the peas again, he was sure they had a weird name, 'man' or 'mang' something. “Are you sure?”

“Off course Magnum, I am English. They are snow peas.”

Magnum turned back to the the fridge. A feeling of creepy oddness running down his spine. He opened the crisper and this time pulled out a zucchini, the more he pulled, the longer and stretchier the vegetable became until finally he pulled the three foot long zucchini out and slapped it down on the counter.

“And what do you call this in England?” Magnum asked.

“It's a zucchini, it's always been a zucchini.”

Magnum was reminded of the cold war spy, caught because he had held a bunch of flowers the 'non-American' way. Higgins had been a spy...

He turned back to the fridge. Bringing out two massive, shiny eggplants, 'aubergine'. 'And what are these called in England?”

“Eggplants, Magnum.”

Magnum stood, holding the two massive eggplants. “You're not Higgy!”

Higgins stood up from the chair, grinning. “You are right. You caught me.” And suddenly the skin on her face started splitting apart to reveal the truth.

And Thomas Magnum screamed and screamed...

\- - -

“Ahhhhhhh!” And screamed himself awake. His body twisting to sit up but as he was on his side so close to the edge of the sofa he started to fall off. Swinging an arm over to catch himself on the coffee table before he rolled over onto the floor, his hand landed in the cold congealed mess of the remains of last night's dinner.

Magnum wiped his greasy hand on a napkin that was near the pizza box and rolled over onto his back getting his breath back. What a stupid dream among a series of other silly dreams he had that night. He rolled his shoulders, he really should stop sleeping in the lounge room so much.

\- - -

Later that day after Magnum had driven Higgins home from hospital, they were sitting in the car parked in the driveway near the main house.

“Magnum, I really am alright. Is that why you have been so somber today? You've hardly said a few words the whole drive home.”

Magnum turned to face his friend, “I'm sorry, I didn't sleep well last night and had nothing but nightmares.”

“Did you eat again just before you slept on the sofa, ...again?” The look on his face gave her the answer. “Magnum!”

“It was really delicious cheese pizza!”

That had Higgins scowling at him. “Magnum, everyone knows not to eat cheese before bed or you'll have a restless sleep and nightmares. Everyone knows that!”

Magnum grinned. He had the silly thought to say 'Yes, Mum.' “And everybody knows that's not really true.”

“Well Magnum you didn't sleep well and you had nightmares.” Higgins unclasped the seat belt, her movement's indicating she was sore and stiff from yesterdays ordeal. Magnum quickly exited the car, running around to help her into the house. “Thanks, Magnum.” Higgins sighed. “What did you dream about that has you so rattled?”

“It wasn't so much that as not sleeping.” Magnum would let her think his sleeplessness and stress dreams were due to food rather than the stress of her being hurt and in hospital. It was easier that way.

“Naked at school, teeth falling out? The usuals?”

Magnum laughed, helping to settle Higgins onto the sofa, ensuring enough cushions were supporting her back. “It was a stupid dream.” At Higgins' 'go on' look, Magnum continued. “It really was silly, you were a spy...” Higgins just raised an eyebrow and smirked. Magnum sat down on one of the other seats. “It was really stupid.”

Higgins' grin widened. She looked delighted and said joyfully “You were dreaming about me.”

In this case Magnum knew she was so joyful because she was teasing him. Magnum stood up to go to the kitchen to get them both a glass of water. On opening the fridge he was pleased to see no mutant vegetables.

“Stupid question Higgy, but what is zucchini called in England again?” Magnum raised his voice to be heard all the way over at the sofa. There were some fruits cut in large easy to pick up pieces in a container that looked good, he balanced one of the glasses on the lid of the container and turned back to the sofa.

“Courgette.” Higgy shouted back. When Magnum came closer she could see he was amused by something. "You're really being more weird than normal today.”

Magnum let Higgins pick up the glass of water before putting the fruit salad box down on the sofa between them, his own glass on the coffee table he twisted to the side to open the container. Magnum let himself relax for the first time since her injury.

“I'm not weird, you're the weird one.” He teased back.

\- - -

Later Higgins would convince him to stay in one of the guest bedrooms rather than on the sofa. This was a compromise that he would grant her because no matter what she said, and how alright she seemed, he didn't want to be too far away if she needed something.

He started to fall asleep on the very comfortable guest bed only to startle himself awake at the remembered echo of Higgy's delighted voice saying joyfully 'You were dreaming about me.'

“That dream was really stupid, but wow what weird symbolism, with the zucchini and the eggplants...” Magnum said to himself rolling over onto his other side and shifting the pillow to be more comfortable under his ear.

And with that thought any drowsiness and sleepiness Thomas Magnum had felt drifted away and he was fully alert.

"Oh."

**Author's Note:**

> Somewhere in the world, at some time, there will be a South African shouting at me saying 'it's not a zucchini, it's called a bladdy baby marrow!'
> 
> This fic is in response to the word Jello. I know that is a brand name of Jelly in US (like 'Kleenex' means 'all tissues'), but I call it Jelly. Can be in US for 10 years, but unless I used the word Jello often, in a drugged state I'm gonna bet I revert to 'jelly'. I reckon Juliet Higgins would too. But I haven't seen the ep so again it's just AU fun where Magnum has suggestive vegetable shaped dreams about Higgy cause his subconscious knows what we all did from as early as the pilot!


End file.
